This is my desert thread

[KegRun]

And we start on 5 nov 03

Day 1...I sit at persco and inprocess the base until the 6th of nov.

[KegRun]

6 nov 03

0400: I wait for a ride to my tent

1400: I wake up to go to work.

1700: They let me go home so I can wake up at 1800 the next day. YAY. Some sleep time.

[KegRun]

7 Nov 03

(remember...this is just my diary...so leave me be about posting. You can post comments all you want in here. I don't care. But just don't tell me to stop...cause I need my sanity)


For those that don't know 0000hrs is 12 midnight. 0001 is 1201am. 0000-1259 is basicaly the same as the am hours. 1300 = 1pm from 1300 to 2400 you basicaly subtract 1200 and you'll get the pm hours. Like 1400 = 2pm.

0900: I wake up....shit...i shouldnt' be up until about 1400. So i unpack my shit. Now i have space. I take out my harry potter book 4 and read it some. I go eat.

1300: I go to bed...no can do...so i read until i have to go to work at 1545.

0518: It's now 8 nov 03. I'm tired..i've been up way to fkn long. I think it's saturday morning here. I haven't done shit yet except learn about waht i'm supposed to be doing incase I have to do something. Monday I begin my workout.

0600: I'm gettin the fuck out and going to bed.

[KegRun]

8 Nov 03

Didn't do shit excpet for train and whore BTP.

[KegRun]

9 Nov 03 (Day 5)

Saw a building get blown up by a Predator UAV (un-manned air vehicle). COOOOL as shit. I just happened to be watching the live feed for fun and BOOOM. I was like..HOLY SHIT GUYS that fkr just dropped a bomb. Everyone looked at it and the camera on the UAV turned around and looked at it's tail end where one bomb was left and the other was empty. That was fkn tight as hell. The Predators are fkn tight as hell too.

Other than that...nothing but more training.

[Jazwana]

*bump* how's the desert life? we need updates!

[KegRun]

a little bit of tent city

[KegRun]

I-19, my tent!

[KegRun]

PIZZA HUT!! mmm..this pizza hut > all american pizza huts

Theres a baskin robins and a dunkin doughnuts right there also. I don't go in there. I run from that place. I dont need shit like that. But I'll eat the shit out of a piece of pizza or two.!!

[BuddhaMan]

I don't miss everything being tan at all.

Lets's see your cubby hole inside the tent.

[KegRun]

I gotta buy my new camera first. I didn't take those shots. I"m goin to the BX today to get a cheap digi camera. Same one that took those pics.

[Shogun]

Wow and you have internet there?

[|IB|NieN]

Mmmm sand pizza. Sand has got to be all over everything.

Damn sand.

[Shogun]

Damn the sand!

[KegRun]

yeah we got internet at the workcenters. We even got internet in our tents too! Cable tv also! We have cable for the net and tv underground everywhere. Pretty neat. As for the sand. Actually..yeah..it's pretty dusty everywhere. But not in our food..lol. I would not be paying 9 bucks for a small pizza if that was the case.

[=DBA=Ronin]

I bet you have a lot of sand in your crack though. Nothing like exfoliating your ass everytime you wipe. /me shivers

[Barry_White]

lol thats funny.

[KegRun]

I would just like to announce...

I got laid..TWICE..in the desert. Saturday..and Sunday.

Thank you. out.

[Barry_White]

by who, a man? or a woman, or how doest that work out there.

[|IB|NieN]

By two Camels...

[Shogun]

Camels spit....

[Barry_White]

lol camels spit.

[Herrenvolk]

Originally posted by KegRun
I would just like to announce...

I got laid..TWICE..in the desert. Saturday..and Sunday.

Thank you. out.

Two men?:wideeyes:

[KegRun]

fuck you all!

[Barry_White]

rofl, no gj on scoring some ass.

[BuddhaMan]

Was that yer hawt female friend...the one you posted the pic of in the body armor?

[KegRun]

no... :(

She's back in DC anyways.

The girl I hit wasn't anything special. Like... I probably wouldn't even talk to her at a club. But hey..it's the desert. At least she wasnt fat nor fkn ugly. She was just...eh. BIG TITS though. And she was aight in bed. She rode me like she was at a rodeo. I never seen a girl have an orgasm as long as she did. She about passed out and shit. It was fkn awesome. I didn't even do anything that time.

LMAO...We fell asleep and she woke up and she was like...ooops. She fkn drooled on my arm...AND THEN TRIED TO WIPE IT OFF and she just smeared it all over my arm..LMAO! I was like.EEEEEW!! haha. But it's all good. Cause I forgot she was in bed and she had her leg between my legs and I blew LOUD ass. HAHAHAH! No fkn lie. As soon as i did it my eyes flew open and I was like..sorry. LMAO. She was like..it's ok..i drooled on you..lmao. SO FKN NASTY!!! HAHA!

[Barry_White]

lol, as long as shes not fat is all that matters.

[Barry_White]

no offense to my big bitches out there*

[BuddhaMan]

She's markin her territory with the drool!

[CDSaint]

what did you do to get her to your tent? trade her your mre's?:laugh:

[Barry_White]

lol, he did!

[KegRun]

lol...naw. I was just out drinking with the red horse dudes (the construction guys) and I somehow ended up with like 8 beers instead of the usual 3. Well..me and the girl had been talking since she was actually cool to talk to. Next thing I know, she's all flirty and shit. So i walked her back to her tent. Said fk it and just kissed her. She asked what I was gonna do now. I said..go to your tent or mine. lol. And it worked. She asked if I had a bunkmate and I said no. So we went to mine.

Man I really need to change my sheets. I'm lazy. My bed smells like budussy badly. But like i'm said..i'm lazy.

[|IB|NieN]

budussy: A lingering odor caused by the anatomical mixture of anal, penile, and vaginal secretions...most often smelled during dirty monkey sex.

[Barry_White]

rofl, budussy. havent heard that word in awhile.

[Shogun]

rofl nien!!

[KegRun]

WOOT! Tapped it again last night! I think I've found a fuck buddy! GG Desert Queen! No farting or drooling went on last night either!

[Herrenvolk]

LOL you fuck!
That's hilarious:laugh:

So are all your cabins private? Like where else would you go if not there?:confused:

[Wolf]

got pic?

[BuddhaMan]

LOL @ cabins. These are tents with like 6 or 8 doods living there.

Bunker sex is the other alternative.

DO NOT fuck in the desert...the cops watch you on their NVGs and the infared detection stuff. They see two warm bodies walk into the desert and become one hot mass then two hot bodies walk back.

[KegRun]

Yeah..we got like 10 doods living in my tent, but our areas have like blankets and wall lockers blocking everything off. So it's like our own personal space. And I"ll never get a bunk mate cause I have the air condition tube laying on my bunk!! YES! Last night me and her I guess were really loud..lmao! I got to work and my buddy was like..Heeeey Cooooole. I was like sup dude. Then he started making bed spring sounds..lmao! I started cracking up. I'm like a god or some shit in my tent. And me and that girls situation is cool too. Like...when I see her at the hang out..i just walk by her and say Sup. And keep walking. lol. I'll bullshit with all these other people...and then when it gets time..i'll walk over to her table and sit like at the oppostie end. Then slowly but surely she plays musical chairs till she's next to me..hehe. It's pretty cool to have a fuck buddy in the desert. She lubs my kawk!

[Wolf]

[i]It's pretty cool to have a fuck buddy in the desert. She lubs my kawk! [/B]

LOL, I had a fuck buddy when in the army in Germany. Was pretty cool cuz she was a Sgt in Supply. Always got extra stuff and could go back to base when on maneuvers for 2 weeks and shower, haha.

[BuddhaMan]

Wolf...what was your sig?

[Wolf]

nuthin

[Wolf]

I'm beginning to wonder why Keg has so much time on his hands to post so much here.... WTF are you doing over there?

[CDSaint]

its says right there on his location exactly what he does there...;)

[KegRun]

yeah basically.

I track outages and I authorize outages. I calculate the percentage of services that will go down or has gone down. It's an easy job, but it's not what I like to do. I like being busy (most of the time at least). So I surf the BTP, match.com, and other stuff all day.

[BuddhaMan]

bean counter

[CDSaint]

sounds like potato pealer would be more your suit if you are that bored!:laugh:

[KegRun]

We had an Aussie rock band that came here this weekend. They were actually pretty good. Sang alot of AC/DC and shit like that. Not bad.

I'm getting scared that that chick might be starting to like me a tad to much. Ugh.

[CDSaint]

is she on the depo shot btw? i was told that its mandatory that the women go on that kind of birth control...hope she did that! tsk tsk tsk!

[KegRun]

she said she's on the pill. wutever.

[CDSaint]

heh. riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight! gg dad!:moon: :rolleyes: :eek:

[Wolf]

[i]I'm getting scared that that chick might be starting to like me a tad to much. Ugh. [/B]

Ohahhahoaoaaahaha po' thing you...:wideeyes:

[BuddhaMan]

The Depo-Provera shot isn't mandatory at all. No birth control is mandatory.

[|IB|NieN]

If youre scared she is starting to like you too much... you need to start getting creative.


Give her a dirty sanchez, or a donkey punch or something next time.

[Barry_White]

give her the cleveland steamer!

[Barry_White]

or the angry pirate:


this is how it goes... when she is blowin u and u are about to go, pull out and shoot it in her eye. she then will be covering her eye and next u stomp on her foot. at this pont she will be hopping around on one foot with a hand over her eye going arg!! arg!!! it just absolutely hillarious. she will really look like an angry pirate!:)

[KegRun]

if you guys knew what I pm ratty at night...you would not be telling me those..lol. Those are weak..lol. No offense..BUT THANKS!! =D

[BuddhaMan]

/me votes for a Hot Carl

[KegRun]

Here are a few you might like.

The Chili Dog
This when I'll take a hot dump (since you guys seem to be into the skat nasty) on a girl’s tits and then proceed to titty fuck her.

Flaming Amazon
This one’s for all you pyromaniacs out there. I'll start screwing her and right when I'm about to cum, I'll pull out and quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then...extinguish the flames with my jizz!

The Flying Camel
A personal favorite. As she is lying on her back and I'm hammering her from my knees. I'll very carefully move forward and prop myself (without using my arms) on my dick while it is still inserted in her cooter. Then I'll proceed to flap my arms and let out a long shrieking howl much like a flying camel. Strictly a classy move.

[|IB|NieN]

rofl

Flying camel = teh r0x

[KegRun]

Tonight is NEW YEARS!! YAY! I saved up liqour in my water bottle ( have about 8 shots in there) and then I'm gonna get my 3 beers tonight!! ROCK! Rumor is that they might give us 4 or maybe even 5.

It's 522 p.m. Here. 6 hours and 38 minutes to go!!!!!! Happy New Years y'all!!!

[Barry_White]

happy new years!


those are all nice, but the only one u really could pull off is the flying camel which is great.:)

[KegRun]

I'm sure I could do the Flaming Amazon. There's no way she would know what I was doing til it was to late. Sure I might get the shit kicked outa me by a girl...but damn..it'd sure be a great military story to tell my grandchildren one day.

[Barry_White]

ha, yes that would be a great story!

[Taya]

this thread is just WRONG!

[Barry_White]

lmao, yea for a girl its not the best thread.:)

[BuddhaMan]

Glad: You know the rules...no open flames in the tent. :)

Besides, the only smoking in the tent should be her on yer pole.

[Taya]

you all should be shot

[FuRy]

god do i love this thread please dont stop posting man :)

[|IB|NieN]

So, did you get some more dirty monkey sex on New Years Eve man?

You should have given her some of your saved shots, so you could sneak it in her pooper.

[BuddhaMan]

Man, I'm glad NieN's back to posting!

We missed ya man! :D

[KegRun]

Actually..she and her friend snuck some 100 proof on base via Contractors. Lky sluts. And speaking of the pooper, she was so friggin wet that I 'accidently' shoved it in the wrong hole. It was amazing to see her flail her arms and legs around and see the intensity of sheer pain sweep across her face..lmao!

[KegRun]

Oh yeah...

So last night...we are sitting in the smoke pit pretty drunk thanks to a sergeant that didnt' want his three beers. Well....she says to me "I shouldn't probably tell you this...but I sorta like you...alot." Fkn shit is what went through my head. Then she said "But what I'm worried about is...that I'm really really reallly gonna like you way to much before we leave." So now I'm like..oh dear god no. So I told her "You aint that half bad either" :D. I mean seriously..what else WAS I supposed to say?!? Ugh...

[CDSaint]

that you are only using her for the booty call. oh and take a pic of your slap mark on your face after you say those words to her. :laugh:

[KegRun]

I think she knows that. That's why she didn't want to tell me she likes me. But she did. Probably hoping I would say the same. I have no heart to hand out anymore though! I r evil.

[BuddhaMan]

I think the "friend with benefits" is mutual.

'Accidentally' slip it in her pooper a few more times and she'll change her tune. :D

[CDSaint]

stone cold and heartless...great new nicknames there sport!:moon:

[|IB|NieN]

Aww, isnt that schweet!?

She likes you... I would hope she likes you. She is lettin you probe her.

[Shogun]

Well tbh Keg you should probably tell her that your feelings are more along the lines of friends with benefits. Leading her on will lead to no poon in the future! Trust...no poon is no good.

[KegRun]

OK NOW THERE IS DRAMA!!! LMAO!

So there is the other chick named Angie. Now Angie and me hung out when we first got here and smoked in the pit together. She would email me and ask me if I wanted to go smoke..so i said ok and stuff. But Angie was always talking about these guys and shit and was always kinda shadey towards me at night. Like I would say hi and she'd be like hi and keep on walking. She was always talking to mad dudes at the Wagon Wheel. So I was like...ok ..wuteva..lol. Then Jen comes along and that's Angies friend. Jen is who I have fun with now. WEELLL... Angie has been in this shitty mood for a few days now. I would say hey to her and she would just look at me and not really say shit. So I really don't give a shit. Come to find out..she's PISSED at me!?!?!?!?!?! WTF!!!! I have no clue why. So my friend Justin was talking to her and she said she's mad cause I don't talk to her anymore and I don't hang out with her anymore! And now Jen is thinking she's also jealous of me and likes me. OMG...I coulda sworn I came to the desert..not fkn highschool.

[|IB|NieN]

Doesnt matter how old you are. The drama with relationships is always the same.

Tell Angie to start puttin out for ya if she wants more attention hehe

[Shogun]

My Milkshake brings all the boys...er girls to the yard
Damn right
its betta than yours
I can teach you
but I have to charge


<0.o>

[BuddhaMan]

LOL @ highskewl..

OMG...Glad you didn't say "hi" to me in the hallway. I fkn hate you!!!!! :D

[KegRun]

LoL...i have a new word now.

There is this wigga girl who throws up a peace sign and says deuces when she does it. So of course we have been making mad fun of that and saying deuces all the time.

But then my buddy was standing there when she did that and she said "Deuces" with the peace sign. LoL..he then says "Aces" and gives her the bird...lmao! I was dying laughing. So now everytime we part we always say aces. Funny shit. Maybe you had to be there..I was..so it's funny.

[Wolf]

OMFG, that is funny as all hell!!

ACES!!

If anyone EVER does that to me, I have an Immediate comeback. OMG

[Wolf]

*aces* bro...

[Taya]

:laugh:

[BuddhaMan]

Wolf looks so "corporate" when he's on the job...

Watch the fuck out when he's in his barn. :D

[KegRun]

LMAO! *ACES* muthatfka!! lmao! awesome!!

[KegRun]

Shit we have to deal with when going off base.

[KegRun]

Glad it wasnt' me.

[KegRun]

DEATH TO THE AMERICANS............I'm sure Bun-Knee would love to see these pix by the way..heh.

[BuddhaMan]

Is that snow on the ground? Where are those pics from?

[Shogun]

Now that would be shitty!

[|IB|NieN]

How very creative.

[Wolf]

jebus, and all i do is look at my tires for a visual pressure check. fuck...

[KegRun]

it might be up in Afghanistan. Snows there. Not sure if that's snow anyways. Kinda looks like the sand around here also. Who knows. Just glad it wasn't me cause I just thought about my trip downtown and not one time did we check under our vehicle. We were too busy exploring the town to think about it. I'll be more cautious next time though.

[SealClubber]

Any developments on the women situation? :D

[FADES]

Damn, Glad! That is some crazy, funny shit. This is the first time I have read this thread so I had a little catching up to do. sounds like your having at least a little fun in the desert. Hey, man, make the most of it! Please continue soon. I look forward to hearing more!

[KegRun]

Ok with the women issue. Well they had it out I guess when they went to the bathroom together while we were hanging out the other night. Jen (banging) told Angie (not banging) to stop fkn with me and giving me shit. Cause she was being a bitch, but I was playing it off cause she really wasn't bothering me. But she was bothering Jen. So that had it out in the bathroom and then Angie said she would stop. I still have no clue why she was hating me. She's cool to me again now. After Jen left my tent and went back to hers..she turned on the ligth and there was a nekid dude in bed with angie. lmao. nice surprise eh. angie and jen bunk by the way.

Drama is done. For now. We are all going off base tomorrow...so who knows what shit I might start in the van.

[BuddhaMan]

LOL..Angie got over you pretty quick and went and grabbed some quick dick eh?

As we say in Alaska: SKANK ON!

[KegRun]

She is like whoah. I swears she's had 5 dudes in less than 2 weeks.

[FADES]

Too bad. Would've been interesting to see if you could land 'em both at the same time.;)

[KegRun]

hahahhahha...I just pissed this one chick off that works with me.

First off, I'm an easy going guy, so I"m a target for jokes. Plus I can take them and give them just as fast. So it usually doesn't bother me. Well..today is just one of those days where I'm not in a good mood. Well...because i'm GOOD at getting shit done in a qwik manner..i'm able to fuck around on the net until there is more work to be done. So people who fkn SLACK off like to joke how I don't work and shit. Which is fine cause I usually play along. Well this one girl who was whining how much work she was doing (and she was working on ONE thing..OoOOOoo) said something to the effect of "I can't do that right now, I"m really busy with blah blah". Then this dude was like..well Matt can help you. Then she said "What Matt? That Matt? You know he doesn't do shit." Then I was like.."Ahhh Haaa. Funny. How about I REALLY don't work for one day and then we'll see how much work really gets done."

Not less than 15 seconds later she asks me a fkn question about the job she is doing. "Do I have to send this to TCCC?" I then replied, "How the fuck do I know..i never fkn work" and then I started laffing. HAHAH..She had the audacity to get PISSED..LMAO! She was like.."I was just fkn asking a question, you could just answer me." I told her, "How the fuck am I supposed to know though since I don't work". Omg she was pissed. Inside I was cracking up...outside I had smart ass look on my face...lmao. Funny thing is..I"M THE LOWEST FKN RANKING DUDE IN MY SHOP! Why is it just me and ONE E-5 (i'm e-4) are the only fks that know anything?! I swear I get asked the same questions everyday. BUT I DON"T WORK. My shop SNCO (lead guy) asks me shit that shouldn't even pertain to me. Such as..."should this go on our slides for the briefing?!" A briefing that GENERALS and COLONELS from the PENTAGON look over. OMG!!! BUT I DONT WORK! Why is that I am the one that has to call commanders of other bases to figure out shit that is going over there. WHY ME..lmao. It's not my job..it's my higher ranking peoples job. It's bullshit..but it's funny. Because they know rank doesn't scare me and that I talk to these people like I know them. I have 'people skills' I guess. BUT I DON"T WORK! Fk them...drink my squat sauce you fucks.

[/rant]

[Taya]

squat sauce LOL

[BuddhaMan]

Matt, you left off the opening [rant] tag...you obviously don't know shit about HTML.

Gig for Glad.

Hey man, can you help me with Cascading Style Sheets later? :D

[KegRun]

Yeah..i know i left that off. I see other people do that and I wanted to be a follower..not a leader. :(

[BuddhaMan]

My humor escapes you....

Re-read your post above then read mine. It's called 'sarcasm'.

[KegRun]

No I got it. lol. I was just fkn around also. MY HUMOR EXCAPES U! Shouldn't u be like sleepin in and shit..it's saturday

[Taya]

its sure is saturday... and i have to werk! :mad:

[SealClubber]

I dont! Im off! :finger:

[Vyper]

Yeah well I'm werking on Sunday! :P

[BuddhaMan]

I passed out at around 7 pm Friday and woke up around 4 am Saturday. I think my body needed that since I'm fighting a cold ATM.

[SealClubber]

Originally posted by Vyper
Yeah well I'm werking on Sunday! :P

Im off sunday also!!! :finger:


:moon: :D :moon: :D :moon:

[SealClubber]

Glad! We need fresh dramatic stories on your never ending quest for the vagina!

[Taya]

my "weekend" is tuesday and wednesday.. how fucked is that? my friday is a MONDAY! aghhh! oh well.. by me not going out and drinking every weekend, im saving a TON of cash! :D

[Vyper]

And probably keeping a ton of weight off too!

[KegRun]

Originally posted by SealClubber
Glad! We need fresh dramatic stories on your never ending quest for the vagina!

Raise your hand if you are ready for drama! :D

OK! This doesn't involve me this time though..it involves the Angie chick.


So she thinks she is a mad player and she's NOT! But she's had probably 10+ different guys since she's been here. (2 months). Well..she's fkn 4 guys right now. Fk one..leave tent...go fk another. It's pretty nasty. But this one dude she's banging, really likes her. And he was sitting at our table Saturday night. His name is Mike. Well..another guy named Andy..whom she is also banging...is sitting at a different table. Andy come over and sits with us. So she's sitting between two guys she's fkn and the two dudes don't even know it. Mike even buys Andy a drink! LMAO! She's talkin to both of them and trying to be cool about it. Mike aint dumb though. Well..Angie tells Mike to go to his tent and she'll be there in 30 minutes (gross). Mike leaves. Angie takes andy to HER tent..lmao. So they're getting their fuck on. DUN DUN DUN....Mike walks into her tent with flashlight in hand and goes to her room...rips curtain open...shines it on them both while they are in mid fuck! HAHAH! He starts screaming at her and telling her he wants to see her outside and shit! LMAO! There's like 10 other girls living in that tent and shit too..LMAO! So she was all crying outside the tent and shit..lmao.

She REALLY fucked up too, cause he works behind the bar and never marks her card. HAHA!

[BuddhaMan]

Busted!

Sometimes when ya play the game ya lose. I shall rename this skank to the name given to all Angie dorm sluts--

Skangie Angie

[KegRun]

hahha..skangie angie..nice dude! lmao.

by the way... http://www.beyondtheportal.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=25843

[KegRun]

pix

[KegRun]

doha1

[KegRun]

Looks different than the first pix i put huh.

[KegRun]

yup...i swear i'm in the desert..lol.

[KegRun]

hehe.

[SealClubber]

well tell us who'd who in the pics! :\

[KegRun]

left to right

skangie angie (yellow shirt)
Justin
Jen
Me

[KegRun]

Bill Clinton is coming today.

whoopeeeeeeedeeeeedoooooooooo

I will not be going..lol.

[FADES]

Maybe Skangie Angie will blow ol' Bill!;)
Doha looks really nice!
And I wanted to say one thing about this:

It's not my job..it's my higher ranking peoples job. It's bullshit..but it's funny. Because they know rank doesn't scare me and that I talk to these people like I know them. I have 'people skills' I guess.

Look, I already told you! I deal with the goddamn customers so the engineers don't have to! I have people skills! I am good at dealing with people! Can't you understand that? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!

[SealClubber]

Jen's a nice tag :)


Dunno about the face from her wearing the sunglasses, but everything else seems to be in order! :D

[KegRun]

better than ur face!

nice quote Fades..lmao!

[BuddhaMan]

I can see Jen's pearl necklace in that last pic. :D

[SealClubber]

Originally posted by KegRun
better than ur face!

Nah man, Im the sexiest mother F'er on this planet! :)

[KegRun]

Originally posted by SealClubber
Nah man, Im the sexiest mother F'er on this planet! :)


Fuck..ur right!

[FADES]

Yeah, SC, you are...but I still wouldn't do ya.

[Unforgiven]

i for one cant wait for glad to come home from the desert so this fucking thread will die :mad:

[=DBA=Ronin]

You look like your trying to perform a variation of "The Flying Camel" in that last pic man...how appropriate for the desert!!

The Flying Camel - As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl, much like you would imagine a flying camel to sound like. Strictly a class move.

[SealClubber]

Originally posted by Unforgiven
i for one cant wait for glad to come home from the desert so this fucking thread will die :mad:

Is that jealousy I smell? ;)

[BuddhaMan]

You smell the stank on Glads downlow....if ya catch mah drift. O.o

[SealClubber]

Lets keep your sexual fantasies to yourself Budda :finger:

[BuddhaMan]

Hey, you smelled it, not me.

[KegRun]

LMAO RAT! I fkn hate you dude..lmao!

Ok..funny storry involving JEN!

This is the email she sent me...

"Yeah it was really good. To the point where I am about to puke cause I am so stuffed.
I have a funny story to tell. Its rather embarassing though so PLEASE do not tell anyone. I will copy it from what I told my friend.

I was just chair-force.com message boards on the
vagina monologues forum(which is pretty much where the guys ask the girls whatever they want), reading the how often do you masturbate thread. My superintendent snuck up out of no where and saw it. He is a real holy roller type person and saw the thread I was on and almost dropped dead.

He said: what is this?
Me: ummmmm geeee how did that get there?
Him: You put it there
Me: Well let me minimize it then
Him: Better yet, why don't you close it out and never go back there again
Me: yes sir

So, my face is as red as a cherry because now I look like some kind of pervert in his eyes. I was totally racking my brain for an excuse and almost said I am doing some research on the effects of masturbation for my psychology degree and stumbled upon this site. But I decided it was probably in my best interest to just shut it. So he walks out. I thought that was the end of it. The phone rings and someone else answers it. SSgt M, SMSgt
K wants to see you in his office right now.
Shit, shit, shit.
Off I go. He has papers in his hand. First gives me AFI 33-129 with the outlined area that says Obscene materials, but is not limited to, pornography and other sexually explicit materials.
Then he says he doesn't expect this from someone of my character and he thought I had better morals and values than that. As a NCO in the Air FOrce I need to set the example, not be made an example of. Blahblahblah.
I said I was sorry and I just happened to stumble upon that topic of conversation. He said whatever I do at home on my own time is my business, but not on the govts time. Now here is the catch.......he is the one who was driving us to the Army post. So he's probably thinking I have to ride in the car with this freaking lil pervert.

[FADES]

OH MY GOD! DON'T TELL ANYONE!:laugh:

[KegRun]

Yeah..lol.

[SealClubber]

Your gonna fall in love with this girl and have like 20 kids! :D

[FuRy]

lol

[CDSaint]

she may already be carrying his durty seeds...:wideeyes: :laugh:

[Barry_White]

i agree with seal, cut it off b4 its too late.

[CDSaint]

his schlong? no need...with his luck it will fall off before he gets to solid US soil!:laugh:

[KegRun]

fk u CD..lol. knock on wood!!!!!!!!!

As for the girl..ugh..i think she's in love. I hate being so lovable!

I"M A DICK! I'M AN ASSHOLE!

But yet chix dig that shit for some god awful reason. BITCHES!

[KegRun]

Oh...and by the way...

CD just emailed me and called me a fat ass.


CD's email:

yeah i was shocked to see how chubbs you are or have gotten! stop having jenn be on top and do something!!!LOL! do push ups for crying out loud! i see a hint of boobages from that shirt of yours! ;p


Thanks CD. ........hooch.

[CDSaint]

lol yeah and i meant every word in that email! that pic makes me want to pinch your nippies! titty twisters are protruding there buddy!:0wn3d: :laugh:

[KegRun]

I fkn hate you forever. I'm not coming to Vegas.

[BuddhaMan]

That makes two of us on the "say no Vegas" tip.

[CDSaint]

LOL! that is fine with me Matt and Buddha. but just so everybody knows this was the outcome of 25 or so emails i corresponded with Matt last night. turns out there was some appreciation to the mean and honest comment i made about him.



last email received after i went to bed and opened up my email this morning...


wooooohoooo...i just ran for fkn 30 minutes straight today. Boosted it from
my usual 25. AND I WASN"T EVEN TIRED AT THE END OF IT! I was pissed that it
ended so soon. Tomorrow i'm boosting my speed also and keep it at 30 to see
how i feel. WOOHOO...BACK ON TRACK! THANKS MEAN FKR!


see i got you to at least work out again you turkey feces! and you're welcome you slacking DICKHEAD! LOL!:laugh:

[SealClubber]

Originally posted by KegRun


I"M A DICK! I'M AN ASSHOLE!

But yet chix dig that shit for some god awful reason. BITCHES!

This is true, alot of women love guys treating them like shit :\

My friend Stacy was 16 when she met this guy that just got out of prision! He was 22, and of course she fell head over heels for him! Near the end of the relationship, he started beating the shit out of her - she "still loved him" of course, this happened with several previous boyfriends before also! Pa-fucking-thetic :rolleyes:

I havent talked to her for the last 3 years now... Last I heard she was doing all kinds of drugs and pregnant with some guys kid :\

[FADES]

Back on topic! So, how much longer you gonna be there, Glad?

[SealClubber]

Tell us more stories!!! :bong:

[FuRy]

this thread is truly one of holy porportions

[KegRun]

March 8th is when I leave now I believe.

Nothing to exciting last night. I tried to stay away from the 'wheel' due to the fact I was tired and needed sleep. Though I didn't get much since Jen wanted to sleep with me.

But tonight is Friday night. Tonight or Saturday night should produce some GREAT stories.

[Barry_White]

i think it is funny how keg restarted this thread awhile back, and now its quite the popular thread.:)

[KegRun]

That's cause the diary thing got boring qwik and then I just decided to fill you guys in on shit that was going down here. =)

[KegRun]

I told CD on email.

I'm fkd. She has fallen for me big time. She actually got jealous the other night when some other girl came up and rubbed my shoulders. THis girl has alway done this. She just flirts with me a tad, cause she knows that I aint gonna do shit with her since she's married. But then Jen was kinda drunk and told me "I aint jealous..but I don't like when other girls touch you. I should be the only one touching you"

I told her to get over it.

[CDSaint]

don't forget to RUN today after werk!;)

[KegRun]

I run DURING work. And then I work out at night. Tonight htough I'm also running and doing my ab class!

[CDSaint]

pilates kicks ass!;)

[KegRun]

i'll kick yo ass!

[FADES]

Where is Jen from? Are you going to be close enough to her to hold a relationship when you get home? If not, fuck it, just keep shaggin' until you leave and then say you're not into long distance relationships.

[KegRun]

She's from texas...and i wouldn't care if she was a few hours away...

I'm just not into dating anymore.

[Unforgiven]

you are a fuckin pig man! sorry but it had to be said! you gotta see where she is coming from in her attachment to you. nothing is EVER just sex and thats it! no wonder you cant find a decent woman who isnt gonna break your heart, you are a fucking manwhore!

[Shogun]

lol

[Ganja John]

Get this, I left San Diego for Jacksonville, NC. I spent a week there and now I'm in Philly. On Mon. myself and my Marines head back to NC, and fly to Iraq from there.... Yes, I've been recalled back to active duty. I'm headin' to Iraq with a Bridge company/Bulk Fuel co. Keg I'm comin' out there to see ya.

[CDSaint]

holy shitballs! stay safe too GJ :(

[Barry_White]

kick some ass vulpes!

[Shogun]

huh?

[BuddhaMan]

Ganja John isn't Vulpes aliasing....

How many Marines are there total? I heard on the news last night that 30k Marines will be shipping out. Isn't that like half the force?

We're fucked if we have to go mess with Korea or something like that.

[Taya]

Originally posted by Unforgiven
you are a fuckin pig man! sorry but it had to be said! you gotta see where she is coming from in her attachment to you. nothing is EVER just sex and thats it! no wonder you cant find a decent woman who isnt gonna break your heart, you are a fucking manwhore!
a-fucking-men! finally someone said it! i was gonna say something, but considering im a woman, he would probably rip into me.

[CDSaint]

don't worry chica i always tell Matt he is an ass every other email he gets from me...a couple of nights ago there were at least 10 or a bit less possibly where i called him a DICK out of 26 emails...although he ruins my fun when he admits the truth...:(

[Taya]

well at least hes not in denial :\

[SealClubber]

Originally posted by Taya
a-fucking-men! finally someone said it! i was gonna say something, but considering im a woman, he would probably rip into me.


GET OVER IT! MEN ARE THE SUPERIOR BEINGS! :finger: :0wn3d:

[KegRun]

I'm a pig? How's that? I'm not being mean to this girl. I'm not treating her like shit. I actually bullshit with her all night. We watch TV together and stuff. I hang out with the girl. I don't just do my own thing and then at the end of the night, find her..and fuck her. Plust she's asked me if I liked her and I know what she wants me to say....and I don't. I know she doesn't like my answer and she expresses this with a sigh or 'boys are so stupid'.

Yeah..i don't just come RIGHT out and say...hey..I aint gonna be doing shit with you when I get back to the states. Why? Cause it's fun having sex. She's not a stupid girl..and I know she knows that I'm not into the g/f b/f thing. If she REALLY cared...then she wouldn't be letting me have sex with her.

[CDSaint]

too bad you aren't in that category of men that have superiority SC...you delving into beastiality have just categorized yourself as a degenerate...:moon: :finger: :P

[Barry_White]

oh sorry ganj, i saw that guy in ur avatar and thought u were vulpes. usually when i see that matrix shot i dont even look at the name bc vulpes has the same one. but gl over there anyways.:)

[KegRun]

Yeah Ganj...where you going in Iraq if you can tell me? I might be able to go up to Tallil to deliver a part.

[SealClubber]

Originally posted by CDSaint
too bad you aren't in that category of men that have superiority SC...you delving into beastiality have just categorized yourself as a degenerate...:moon: :finger: :P


I am even above man! I am a God! :cool:

[CDSaint]

god of DOGS...gotcha!:finger: :P

[Barry_White]

god of seals!:)

[SealClubber]

Originally posted by CDSaint
god of DOGS...gotcha!:finger: :P


Worship me! :cool:


Glad.. post more.. n stuff! \O/

[KegRun]

I've had pink eye the last two days. If I see light..my eyeball feels like it's going to explode.

My friends came into my tent at about 1130 last night. I woke up to someone sucking my fingers! I was like..WTF! Then I started laughing at him and told him he's gonna have pink tongue or pink throat in the mouth cause that was my hand I had been rubbin my eye with..lmao! Fkn gross. That dude is wierd, but cool.

[CDSaint]

uhhhhhh wtf? a guy was sucking you off?!?! ewwwwwwwww!!! bet you were turned on!:wideeyes:

[KegRun]

yeah..it WAS kinda sexy. I licked my fingers afterwards too!

[Barry_White]

pink eye, or the klap from that bizzie?

[CDSaint]

he has vaginal warts on his lips and his tongue is about to fall off...:laugh:

[KegRun]

My eyeball feels like it's going to explode like an old 80's scary flick movie. And then dissolve and shit..yuk..

[CDSaint]

doing taxes causes temporary brain meltdown:(

[Wolf]

Is it from a nerve agent? Maybe a squatsauce bomb... :-/

[KegRun]

lmao...no.

[SealClubber]

Originally posted by KegRun
I've had pink eye the last two days. If I see light..my eyeball feels like it's going to explode.

My friends came into my tent at about 1130 last night. I woke up to someone sucking my fingers! I was like..WTF! Then I started laughing at him and told him he's gonna have pink tongue or pink throat in the mouth cause that was my hand I had been rubbin my eye with..lmao! Fkn gross. That dude is wierd, but cool.




I think im gonna hand my Rainb0w Warri0r title to this guy! http://smilies.crowd9.com/cwm/cwm/erm.gif

[KegRun]

Anyways..

So i don't have conjunctivitis (pink eye). I have UV-itis. Pink eye is the inflammation of the outer part of the eyeball. UV-itis is the inflammation of the fkn INSIDE of my eyeball! OMG! So like..the first doctor was a complete idiot when he said I had pink eye. FKR! I had NO Symptoms of pink eye except for my eye being as red as a bottle of ketchup. I was told that I have the possibility of losing 100% sight in my right eye!! So they used some vertical light machine thing on me and looked in my eye. Doc said that I have cells floating around in my eyeball. I was like..is that normal. He said..hell no. So I got scared and was like..Great..i'm gonna go fkn blind then? He said..probably not as long as I take the medicine he prescribed.

So..wish me luck.

[KegRun]

Oh yeah....

So I sent an email out with the Afghan bombing link. I accidently left in some conversation that I'm having with this girl at a different base. Never met her before. Never seen her before. We just work together over the phone and she started emailing me and asking me questions and stuff.

Well..the email really didn't say much except for waht do you notice in a girl/guy at first when you see them. That's about it.

Well...the girl Jen here got it..and read it. At first I thought she didn't care since she kinda said that to me.

Well this is an email she meant to send to a friend...but instead sent it to me! HAHAHA!! What a way to fail.

*EMAIL*
Yeah read this. To me.....it sounds like he was 'flirting' with this girl. And then he sends it out to all these people..........half of them who are here and know that we're together. Ummm yeah I feel like an ass? Kinda? I dunno. But then he said I had pretty blue eyes? I hate men. Speaking of hating men. I saw Brent and Cynthia on their little romantic walk home. How adorable. Haha. I hate him. I want to put a curse on him, but that would just come back to bite me in the ass times 3. Karma is a bitch though. He'll get his.

*/EMAIL*

I'm guessing Brent is some boyfriend she had when she first got here. Like she knew him from the states and shit and then he didn't want anything to do with her anymore.

Also...I'm in severe pain with my eyeball. She got upset cause I didn't want her to sleep with me last night. She appologized for it this morning...but I don't care anymore.


/me pulls the plug on her.

[BuddhaMan]

Gotta love that convenient "Reply to all" button some peeps use. LOL!

[FADES]

OOPS!:wideeyes::laugh:

[KegRun]

Up in Iraq. A buddy of mine up there took this picture. It's supposed to be Abraham's (from the bible) house.

[Barry_White]

wow nice pic. heh, well now u can place the blame on the girl instead of finiding an awkward way of breaking it off with her.:)

[CDSaint]

wow is that a busload of tourists coming into the pic there? i hope they are making tons of dinars is it?:D

[SealClubber]

UPDATES GLAD! UPDATES! :bong:

[Wolf]

6 forkin daze!!! We need updates!!!
WTF!!!


SLACKER!!

[=DBA=Ronin]

Originally posted by KegRun
I've had pink eye the last two days. If I see light..my eyeball feels like it's going to explode.

My friends came into my tent at about 1130 last night. I woke up to someone sucking my fingers! I was like..WTF! Then I started laughing at him and told him he's gonna have pink tongue or pink throat in the mouth cause that was my hand I had been rubbin my eye with..lmao! Fkn gross. That dude is wierd, but cool.

I just spent the better part of an hour reading every thread in here and this one just baffles me the most. Why, keg, why was ther a guy sucking on your finger as you slept? And why people, o why didnt anyone else find this strange?!!? I would have gotten up to that and started takin heads...wtf!!!

Anyway, fu keg. Sounds like this chicy chic of yours wants you to commit to her man. It doesnt matter if she "knows" your not lookin for that or not...if you keep taggin her shes gonna want something back in return. Cut your loses while your ahead before you realize she is some psycho bitch who just cant take no for an answer. If worse comes to worse just take her out for a drive in the desert and bury her in Abrahams tomb.

[KegRun]

ok..so my eye is still fucked and I can barely see out of it. NOT cool. I'm starting to see little flashes of white light sometimes. I've played 50+ hours of Final Fantasy Tactics on the GBA:SP.

Me and Jen chilled the other night and really..the stories are just getting boring now. It's the SAME shit everyday. Angie still hates me..for no reason at all. She's still fkn multiple ding dongs. Jen is still having super duper feelings for me. She said how do I think about her. I was drunk and said something to the effect of...I think of girls in 3 ways. With my heart...my mind..or my dick. lol. She asked which one was her. I said my mind. She then got mad and why did I say my mind. I asked her..what were the other 2 choices I told her. She couldn't remember what they were even though I just said them 10 seconds ago..so i told her to think about it and go to sleep. I was actually going to just tell her I'm still not over my ex. Which I've come to realize is the truth. I'm really just not ready to date...or I've just not met anyone that wow'd me enough to date. I was laying there..and actually thinking of my ex and how i used to love laying next to her and smellling her hair and feeling her soft skin. *sigh*.

Oh well.

I have a mouse in my room. HE's about 3 inches and I call him Rebel. He's cute. I'm sure he's nasty though. But he's still cute. He hops like a kangaroo when I throw a sock at him.


As for the whole finger sucking thing...yeah..it was gross. I'm telling you...this kid just doesn't care though..lol. He's fkn funny and wierd at the same time. Then he passed out from being drunk on my floor and so did Jen. So I had 2 fks just sleeping and my eye is throbbing. Then Andy (finger sucker) knocked my clock out from the outlet so I was late in the morning about an hour. Then I was allmost late the next day but I actually ran ..allllll..the way from tent city to where I work. That was a good ten minute run in fkn boots. That didn't feel good. Plus it was pretty embarrasin.


I GOT MY BROOKE BURK CALENDAR TODAY IN THE MAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've got 41 days left.

[Wolf]

finger suckin drunks....

[KegRun]

....w3rd is...When I leave here..i'm gonna take a few days of leave in Germany and party and get FKD up! Picture will occur.

[Taya]

i have a question..
why are we supporting the troops when it seems all they do is get drunk?

[BuddhaMan]

One drunk does not an Air Force make.

[Taya]

lol buddha, are you drunk? cause i dont understand that sentence!

[BuddhaMan]

Negatory..I'm about to go running. Phat Buddha will be Slim Jim in about 3 months. :D

[FADES]

Well yeah! If you keep running for 3 months straight!:finger:;)

[Wolf]

Ouch!@

[KegRun]

We are not drunk at work. We only are supposed to get 3 beers but some of us know how to get around it. And most bases don't have a beer tent!


Ok..update on Angie..lol.

Well..one guy she's been taggin...came up to her the other day...lol..and told her his dick hurts!!! So she had to give a list of the guys she's fucked and then the doctor had to call them in and get a list of the girls they've fucked..lmao!

I'm waiting on what Jen tells me what Angie had and what she gave to all these other guys..lmao!

[KegRun]

OH! And Bhudda...I'm running 3.7 miles in 35 minutes now! Not bad. When i have to run my mile and a half..I think I might be doing it in about 10 minutes if I try hard!

[FADES]

Don't run when you are hard, man! That shit can be painful! Good thing you didn't fuck Angie! Sounds liek she's got some Fromunda Cheese workin'.

[FADES]

And clean out your PM box, fucker!

[Barry_White]

what a slut that girl is. i run 2 miles a day here, out in the fuckin shitty ass snowy cold weather. im gonna work my way up to 3.5. thats a nice run to do everyday.:)

[Wolf]

Originally posted by KegRun
OH! And Bhudda...I'm running 3.7 miles in 35 minutes now! Not bad. When i have to run my mile and a half..I think I might be doing it in about 10 minutes if I try hard!

... Mile and a half?? You fuckin PUSSIES!! Was TWO MILES when I was in the Army and I did it in 10:37 (best ever) averaged 11:10.

FU

[Taya]

wolf is my hero

[Wolf]

hahaha

/me blinks

[Wolf]

/me blinks again all south park style

[Taya]

/me steals a 12 pack from wolf's fridge while he blinks

[KegRun]

lmao wolf. I'm glad you could run like that then. But the only way you are gonna be able to run like that again is when you are chasing Taya trying to get your beer back..lol

[SealClubber]

I cant run for shit! :D


Except when you have a 200 pds rot chasing after me, then I can blow everyone away!

Personal experience, so I know its true! :0wn3d:

[FuRy]

i had that happen before seal iwas running fater then michael johnson i was like a g/d ferrari

[BuddhaMan]

Was out of town...catchup time...

FU Fadey!

Wolf lies like a rug!

GJ Glad!

[Barry_White]

hi. i havent posted here in a week or two. :(

[KegRun]

I've been pissing people off lately cause I don't hang out as much. Meaning..i don't have many stories.

But..i told Jenn that I would hang out the other night..and didn't. So she got pissed. THEN THEN THEN...the night before last I told her I was going to the gym. But I actually didn't leave work until like 11. I ususallyleave at 6:30. I stayed and watched American Idol and did some emailing to people that were awake now. I got home...and what did i find sitting on my bed? HER! I was like..uh..wtf? She asked where I was and shit..lmao! I told her work and what I was doing there. She then started crying and stuff and she thought I was cheating on her or something. HAHA! She then was like..ok..i know you think i'm psycho now. LMAO! I started giggling and shit and then she started telling me how I wasn't over my ex g/f and that I had some wall up and shit. OMG. It was like Dr.Philina or something in my tent. So..two days later..we are walking to the chow hall and she said something about this guy Mike and how he was psycho...then she siad..but I should know since I'm definitely fkn psycho. LMAO! I couldn't help but laugh. I told her she keeps saying it and NOT me.

Like I said..boring stories lately cause of my eyeball.

[Taya]

take a picture of it

[BuddhaMan]

How many dudes were on Angies list? LOL....I bet there were entries like: "The dude with brown hair from the club" on it.

[FADES]

"You know, that one guy, who sits at that one table, and drinks beer.":laugh:

[Unforgiven]

just for the record, jenn is the codename for glad's real twinkie named mike....here are lo3gz from a pm he sent me....

Re: hey man
*cries* Things are terrible. He just picked me up and took me out to dinner, I didnt even have to wear panties this time as he took me right there in front of a whole herd of camels.

Seriously..i started laughin out loud man..lol. Thanks, I needed that today. After he powdered my upper lip with his man spackle, he dropped me there in favor of Carlos. I'm so upset man, cuddle with me. I hope Mike dies :(

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unforgiven wrote on 01-30-2004 11:42 PM:
hey man, hows shit with "jenn" werkin out?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Taya]

:eek:
/me slowly backs away...

[SealClubber]

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

[KegRun]

omg dude...lmao!!! I so wish i didn't delete my fkn pm's from you..lol.

[FADES]

After he powdered my upper lip with his man spackle...

:laugh:That shit is hilarious, Ratty!

[Unforgiven]

im hijacking this mother fucker and now laying down some QUALITY pm convos between me and glad over the past week.....


Re: i love you
*cries* That was f'n beautiful..lol!

Seriously..i started laughin out loud man..lol. Thanks, I needed that today.

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unforgiven wrote on 01-30-2004 11:42 PM:
i love your clit in the sun, the morning dew. your clit in the sun, your smiling jew. your clit in the sun, you overwhelming pole. your clit in the sun, your gaping hole. you are my clitmonster, my savior, my port in the storm. you are a god, not a legend, just a cock nice and warm. i wear your snatch like a hat, you buns like a crown. with your savory muff on my tongue, you spin round and round. the desert may be in your soul, but i young man, I HAVE YOUR HOLE!

ph3ar

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



his reply you may notice from another thread about "jenn" :laugh:

[Unforgiven]

yeat another convo that started off on the wrong foot :\


Re: wondering if winter will cease and if my cock will be a shadow of pen ink

sometimes man..lol..you really just leave me speechless... i cant even think of something good to write back..lol.


quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unforgiven wrote on 02-02-2004 09:51 PM:
id love to place my scalding nutsack upon your shoulder and annoint you the asshole of justice and boil your simmering penis within the vain that is my existance. peace be with you young negro and may your virgin holes be penetrated by many well hung latinos armed with cattle prods and beefcakes boiled in tempura!

/me kisses glad and rubs his nuts

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Unforgiven]

ungrateful fuck, doesnt even like my writing :(


Re: wondering if winter will cease and if my cock will be a shadow of pen ink

I'm sending this log into www.perverted-justice.com and then i'm sending them your halloween pic of you in that pimp suit!!!


Also..FK U for not noticing/replying to this thread...http://www.beyondtheportal.com/foru...&threadid=26387



quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unforgiven wrote on 02-02-2004 10:23 PM:
how about you come over and we can put on good will hunting and i could oil up your cock and use you like a pogo ball? you bring the cock, ill bring the underage laotian boys and we will somehow werk it out.....what do you say?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Unforgiven]

i was a tad bit tired when i wrote this one :laugh::laugh::laugh:

Re: i fucking hate you

Aint it wierd how you hate someone and then you change your mind?

Right before I left for the desert I heard my aunt had 4 heart attacks and 2 strokes in one week. I thought she was gonna die but she pulled through. I was pretty upset thinking she'd might die. Then I realized I used to hate her so bad.

So bad that I combed my pubes with her toothbrush while I was sitting down taking a shit.

I feel bad for that now though.


quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unforgiven wrote on 02-06-2004 04:24 AM:
you and your 14 inch clit! asshole!

/me runs away crying like mer over her 85 year old sugar daddy refusing to buy her a new beamer!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Unforgiven]

this aint on topic but i dont care. here is a pm that i sent to ()()volk about a converation on irc with bun-knee.... im the one in the convo speaking.


sunday morning bun-knee love....

8:54:49`a- im eating pizza this morning for breakfast and thinking of rolling you in batter and sprinkling confectionary sugar on your body and gobbling you up like 8th to semen. interested?
8:55:11`a- dont hide from your true feelings
8:55:18`a- im here for your homosexual needs
8:55:32`a- abuse me, use me, throw me out....i dont care, just ride me like a mexican donkey
8:55:40`a- i love you taylor, bear my children
8:55:44`a- ty and good day to you sir
8:55:47`a- * Unforgiven[TG] bows out


please keep this under wraps. i dont want taylor flailin away about his homosexual needs. i did some research on monique and found out her real name is ron and she is a trucker for the alaskan fishing industry and loves men by candlelight, soft warm baths and roman candles dipped in goose fat. bi!

[CDSaint]

OMG thanks for the laughs you crazy bitch! i needed that!ROFL!holy shit those were funny!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

[KegRun]

wtf? that NEVER gets posted! NEVER!
[quote]
Tyler Durden wrote on 04-15-2003 12:29 PM:
I read this at night when i'm all alone with scented candles lit that i bought from Target.

[quote]
Unforgiven wrote on 02-11-2003 03:54 PM:
LOL oh boy! is she hot or something?
[quote]
Tyler Durden wrote on 02-11-2003 02:53 PM:
noooooo..lol. only way i'll get close to you is if we are teaming up on Mer and we can smack balls while u are taking her up the ass!!
[quote]
Unforgiven wrote on 02-11-2003 03:51 PM:
come one dude, just a lil bit of ass to cock slappin then im done with you. its for charity bro!
[quote]
Tyler Durden wrote on 02-11-2003 02:48 PM:
*office space tone of voice* Uuummm...yeeah. Sorry that Hen or Bunz aint around..lmao. But you know what they say about women..."There's always 2 doors to a house."
[quote]
Unforgiven wrote on 02-11-2003 03:47 PM:
seriously man, im craving male ass! i dun get it!
[quote]
Tyler Durden wrote on 02-11-2003 02:44 PM:
Just don't be as big as that Adabese guy and i'm down.............on all 4's
[quote]
Unforgiven wrote on 02-11-2003 03:42 PM:
im a bull queer, ill take you by force! im gonna love you oz style!
[quote]
Tyler Durden wrote on 02-11-2003 02:40 PM:
fk that man..that's the Kancer. We are just bi-curious.
[quote]
Unforgiven wrote on 02-11-2003 03:38 PM:
air force homos!
[quote]
Tyler Durden wrote on 02-11-2003 02:38 PM:
No way man!! you had ur fun last time!! I'm grabbing the fkn spoon this time and YOU will be the one to taste your own ass this time!!
[quote]
Unforgiven wrote on 02-11-2003 03:37 PM:
bend over and grab your ankles fucker. i have no time for details!
[quote]
Tyler Durden wrote on 02-11-2003 02:36 PM:
HAHAHAH..omg dude..wtf!! You could at least just call me Joseph!!
[quote]
Unforgiven wrote on 02-11-2003 03:35 PM:
i want to fuck your asshole and call you mel!